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Blog Insight & Commentary

38 Reductress Headlines That Are Too Real For Working Women

We can't believe they're satire

Mitra Norowzi
Contributor

On dealing with coworkers...

How to Be as Chill as Mike, While Still Doing All of Mike’s Work
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Inspiring! This Woman Never Misses A Day Of Work, Even When She’s Sick And Fucking Contagious
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Inspiring: These Two Former Coworkers Have Been Rescheduling Catch-Up Drinks for 65 Years
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Wow! This Guy Stepped Outside To Take A Business Call And Was Still Loud Enough To Be Heard Inside
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Uh-Oh! Small Talk With Coworker Apparently Lasting All the Way to Parking Garage

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On the value of mentorship...

How to Mentor the Less Experienced Man You’ll Eventually Work For
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4 Mentors Who Haven’t Tried To Have Sex With You Yet
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Feminist Hero? This Guy Likes to Mentor His Girlfriends

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Read more: Vocation Fry: 21 Times 80 Percent of 100 Just Wasn't Good Enough

On getting stuck doing things that are definitely not in your job description...

Intern Gains Invaluable Experience of Explaining Cis Privilege to 55-Year-Old Employer
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How to Look Busy When Your Boss Tries to Confide in You About His Marriage
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How To Start a Sentence Intending To Quit Your Job And Finish It By Agreeing To Come To Work Early Tomorrow
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Flirt Alert! This Waitress Is Being Kind Because Her Livelihood Depends on It

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On the long toiling road that is career management...

This Woman Just Got Promoted, And All It Took Was Switching Bodies With A White Guy During a Lightning Storm
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Wow! This Woman Has Had The Same Job Tab Open for The Past Four Years
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You Go Girl! This Woman Will Keep Making Lateral Career Moves Until The Day She Dies
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Salary Negotiation Tactics for When You’re Just Cool With Whatever Your Boss Thinks
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How to Find The Right Work-Life-Panic Attack Balance
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Read more: Vocation Fry: 10 Ways to Spend the Money You're Not Making

On finally making it, only to still be treated like your job is to fetch the men coffee...

Impressive! This Female Doctor Specializes in Neurology AND Getting Asked When the Real Doctor Is Coming In
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How to Become So Great A Leader That Men Almost Respect You
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This Female CEO is Still in Charge of Baking Cupcakes When There’s an Office Birthday
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This Superhero’s Design Team Made Her an Indestructible Suit But Couldn’t Design a Scrunchie to Hold Her Hair Back

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On grappling with the monster that is your ever-growing email inbox...

Overachiever Alert! This Woman Sent Two Emails Today
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13 Different Ways to Say ‘Great, Thanks!’ in an Email
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6 Email Sign-Offs That Will Leave Your Coworkers Begging For More
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This Woman Is Still Haunted by a Simple Task She Needs to Do Three Weeks from Now

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Wow! This Woman Spent Her Entire Vacation Checking Her Email 

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Bad Bitch Alert: Stacy Just Circling Back Per Her Previous Email

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On the dudes you work with who seem to be in some sort of competition to see who can rise above the rest to become the Absolute Worst Man In Existence™...

True Ally? This Male Feminist Only Takes Credit For His MALE Coworkers’ Ideas
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Does He Run A Billion-Dollar Tech Start-Up, Or Is He Just Wearing Sneakers?
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This Known Assaulter Claimed He Chose To Leave His Job As If Women Don’t Fucking Talk To Each Other
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Wow! This Guy Harassed Dana Then Endorsed Her For Editing On LinkedIn
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Wow! This Man Is Super Wrong But Also Very Loud So Who Knows

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On the joys of networking…

How to Network Through That Crack in The Bathroom Stall
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4 Networking Openers He Can’t Possibly Read as Flirting But Will Anyway
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Wow! Morgan Keeps Her Lanyards from Every Corporate Conference

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On recognizing that sometimes being able to talk the talk is more significant in the workplace than being able to walk the walk….

5 Ways To Decorate Your Workspace So You Can Say ‘Workspace’ More
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Amazing! This Social Media Manager Just Described Her Job Without Setting Herself on Fire
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Incredible! Woman Tacks ‘If That Makes Sense’ Onto Phrases That Definitely Make Sense
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By Mitra Norowzi

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